What have I become?

Dear Lord, I am becoming one of those super-keen mature students that my mates and I used to snigger about when we were Undergrads. And since I've only been a student for a day, the prognosis is that I'm probably only going to get more insufferable rather than less.

I've already downloaded the year's reading list onto my Kindle (haven't quite started reading yet, that's tomorrow's goal), been harassing the IT department because of a technical issue with my student portal access (Panic! Panic!), am considering joining the Uni badminton team and have spent a happy few moments in the library. First time round all I cared about was the cost of a pint in the student union bar and how many hot guys there were on my course. How times change...

The thing is that as a mature student you've seen a bit of life, you've probably had at least one career and you know it all kind of sucks unless you grab every good opportunity you're lucky enough to stumble across by the balls. In short, mature students are bloody grateful to get a second shot and are less likely to waste it by getting p*ssed up 24/7 and developing an encyclopedic knowledge of daytime TV. Not that there's anything wrong with that when you're fresh out of your teens... it's possibly an essential developmental stage... But at the grand old age of 38 such behavior would be really rather sad. Right?

For me, going back to college gives me the chance to have a second career in something I choose to do, rather then one I fell into by accident and stayed in after discovering that I was quite good at talking cr*p and could put a positive spin on almost anything so long as it didn't actively offend my moral code (and after 15 years working in public relations, the very definition of moral code becomes a bit of a grey area). Yes, I enjoyed it and I had a blast, appreciated the plentiful freebies and met some brilliant people. But PR is essentially a young person's game and I'm too old and jaded now to get excited at the prospect of finding myself at yet another tail-end of a party in the wee hours, chatting to a minor celebrity about their favorite subject - themselves. Yawn.

Instead, I plan to do something that might possibly be worthwhile and helpful to society in general - by charging non-celebrities to listen to them talking about themselves. But the big difference will be that rather than feeling obliged to kiss their butts in order to secure their business, I plan to help my future clients to find clarity and solutions to the issues that plague them. Good, huh? The very prospect makes me feel kind of warm and fuzzy inside - how lovely to be able to do something useful and with a positive impact on something other than the balance sheet.

Needless to say, my therapist's couch will NOT be open to c'lebs of any kind, major or minor...