Saturday, May 28, 2011

Things my kids do when I'm hungover

You can pretty much guarantee that if I dare to go out and party, come home late and wake up with a dire hangover the next day, this is what will happen:

1.  The baby will wake up at 3am and 5am for no apparent reason. Then she'll be raring to go from 6am, demanding to be fed and entertained. She will also choose that day to decide to learn how to go up and down stairs - again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again...
2. If I've managed to negotiate a lie-in the older girls will come in to the bedroom umpteen times, bellow in my ear to wake me up and ask really essential stuff like: "What time is it?", "Where's Daddy?", "Is the Earth really round?" and "Do you think I should wear the pink or the green t-shirt?" Sigh.
3. All three kids will choose to be absolutely hideous, bursting into tears at every available opportunity, arguing about everything possible, moaning about the lack of nice food (i.e. sweets) in the house and telling me I'm the worst mummy in the world.
4. There will be some essential piece of homework that I foolishly neglected to sort out prior to my hangover. The girls will go absolutely ballistic and point blank refuse to do anything that doesn't involve the word 'fun', leading to everyone in the house having a major tantrum. My tantrum will be the most spectacular of all.
5. Worst of all, Alpha will give me absolutely no sympathy for my physical and mental pain but will merely smile smugly and say: "Well, you shouldn't go out if you can't cope the next day, should you?

So, is it worth it? Well, sometimes...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Love it. You know it's bad when not even a mcd takes the edge off....
Definitely worth it for your mental health though.

Anonymous said...

oh dear! that'll be the strawberry mohito's then!!!

Anonymous said...

Just stay drunk, dear!

Louise said...

This is where we miss the playbarns in the UK - they run around until they are completely exhausted and you sit with a hangover-cure breakfast, two nurofen and a book. Used to work every time for me!