I have now changed my mind.
Things that drove me crazy this morning:
- Chronic exhaustion due to the Small(er) One waking up all night with a series of increasingly ridiculous demands
- The Small(er) One spilling her breakfast all over her uniform and screaming when I tried to change her, then screaming when she decided that soggy cornflakes on her lap was too much to bear and that she wanted to be changed after all
- The Small(er) One sitting in the hallway for ten minutes, refusing to go to school because she didn't like the pattern on her socks
- Firstborn being attacked by the Small(er) One bacause she was wearing 'her' scarf
- Getting outside the flat, finally, only to discover that it was pouring with rain. My suede coat and shoes are unlikely to look the same ever again
- The Small(er) One shouting "I hate you mummy, you smell of wee" at the top of her voice and blowing raspberries at me... all the way to school
- Firstborn freaking out because we were late (she is extraodinarily rule-sensitive and twists herself into knots at the very thought of having to go explain herself to the formidable school secretary)
- Once at school, having arrived just in time, the Small(er) One refusing to enter her classroom, preferring to stand in the rain for a full five minutes looking increasingly bedragged and folorn before being carried in, all the time bellowing: "I don't wanna go to school! Wanna stay in the rain! Argghhh!" etc
- Got splashed by a sadist driving at full speed through puddles on the way to the tube. The final death knell for the suede coat. RIP.