Thursday, September 21, 2006

Girls I'd Like Interrupted

Here's what I think:

Cliques start at age 3. Sorry that would be 4 -- because that is the age of the girls who told the rabbit that she couldn't play with them on the playground at school today because she was 3. How do I know? Because she came home and told me how excited she was that she would be 4 soon and could play with her friends again.


That's the pause for me trying to remember to breathe.

Then another little girl told her mom that the rabbit pushed her during class. (The mom thoughtfully delivered this info to me by e-mail.) The rabbit handles aggression by whining. Still. At age 3. When she gets mad she either bursts into tears, or sits in a corner alone. And maybe happily waits until she is 4. I suppose it's possible the rabbit has started to use physical violence when I, the Prince, our friends, her three babysitters and aunt are not around. Anything is possible. I could wake up tomorrow morning the Publisher's Clearing House winner. Anything can happen. And yes I know children push. It's just I'd actually LIKE to see her push sometimes, rather than see her crumple her face and take it.

I have to say, moving to a foreign country where I do not understand the language, where the rabbit and I and the Prince can pretend that all the words flowing from other people and children's mouths are: "How lovely to see you, you're glorious, have a wonderful day!" sounds fairly fantastic right now.

I did tell the rabbit one thing: that being younger than her girlfriends was a very excellent thing and she would understand that one day. That, and girls who tell you that you can't play with them are inevitably the ones who peak at 16. And let's get real mamas, that's just not when you want to peak.

I think this all went just a bit over her head because she stared at me like she does when I ask her if she wants more cauliflower at dinner, and then went to play dress up with her Little Ponies. I am happy to report that I overheard her telling them later that it was okay they were already 5. That even though she was 3, she would still play with them.

And I started breathing again.

4 comments:

mad muthas said...

bless the rabbit! she sounds a far more developed personality that the little madams around her.

Bec of the Ladies Lounge said...

We were lucky, our girl cliques didn't kick in until four!


I can't believe someone would bother to email you about something like that - don't you, like, live in NEW YORK? The biggest, toughest, hardest-nosed city in the world? Can you not get this woman evicted for being a big sissy? Sheesh!

Yummy London Mummy said...

Doesn't it just break your heart? And yet you can't do all that much about it - they have to run the playground rat race, and all we can hope for is that they don't either turn into rats by force of peer pressure or crumple under the might of 'sticks and stones'. It's a hard task for anyone, let alone little girls who still have traces of their sticky-out baby tummies.

And as for the emailing 'my kid is a victim' Mom, tell her if she wants to make allegations about your child then she should raise it Mom To Mom, rather than hiding behind the safety of her keyboard.

Plus you should be proud of the Rabbit. A girl who is sensitive to the feelings of her little Ponies despite being exposed to big 4-year-old bad influences, is a girl who will go far.

Sugarmama said...

Way to process, rabbit!

I remember how shocked I was that this stuff started so early. I do hear you about wishing your girl would just push back instead of letting herself be crushed, but let me just say that it also sucks to hear tell of your child behaving this way to others. In fact, I'm not sure which is worse--to have my girl feel as put-upon as I felt as a kid or to have her turn into one of THOSE girls. I'm sure there's some middle ground, but I'm not sure what it is or how to teach it.