1. When bike riders and peds bark, "Excuse me!" as you knock into them with your puke-stained stroller, don't even turn your head. It makes them think you can be intimidated -- or give a shit.
2. Take your rabbit everywhere -- but remove her within nanoseconds of a melt-down. (Even Manhattan Mama's hate bratty rabbits).
3. Do not pay the nanny to stand in line over-night for a top spot at a competitive nursery school. For God's sake wait until kindergarten.
4. Get your Rabbit acquainted with 2-3 cafe's in your neighborhood. Tell her this is Mama's playroom.
5. Rabbits in designer baby clothes grow up to be Plum Sykes. Avoid.
6. Mama's who ramble endlessly about homeschooling/organic blueberries/the wonders of their Brooklyn Brownstone may be (s)mothers in disguise. Run.
7. Adults who ask what your rabbit's name is, deserve getting a tongue stuck out at them. Do not apologize. This is Gotham. Give out our name????
8. Take-out noodles count as dinner. Take-out dumplings count as dinner. Take-out counts as dinner.
9. Fruit snacks dropped on the subway car floor, stay on the subway car floor.
10. Please. Get a pedicure, get a babysitter, grab your Prince and go out for a margarita. Straight up. No salt. Really. Manhattan Mamas need some airing out too.